Crawling back into my shell

I had a training on Thursday and Friday called “Projectmatig werken”, which basically just means working in a project-oriented way. For me personally, the goal was to learn how to work in a more structured way. It was a good training, with a lot of variety, so it never became boring. And I think there were some very good pointers, but the question still remains if I would actually apply them to my work.

What worried and surprised me though, was how passive I was, and how uncomfortable I felt during most of the training. I thought that I would have more confidence by now, but apparently, you can just drop me in a room full of strangers, and I’ll fall back into my bad habits in a heartbeat. The exercises we had to do in smaller groups went a lot better, apart from the first one. I felt more comfortable and less self-aware during those sessions.

I’ve been staying home a lot lately. I was starting to get exhausted of all the social activities, and of being around other people. I just felt I needed some time all alone. I even had to force myself to get out and do my groceries today! I think it also affects my work (and come to think of it, it might have affected my behavior during the training as well). I really don’t feel like working at all during the past two weeks. There were days before when I didn’t feel like working as well, but they usually only last for 1 or 2 days. Let’s hope I can get some of my energy and enthusiasm back by spending some time all by myself.