So Sick of Myself

I'm so sick of myself right now. So sick of this insecurity and doubt gnawing at my insides for the last couple of weeks, and it affects my entire being. I feel like nobody likes me, that I suck at my job, and that I'll never find love. I feel like a total loser and that I don't really deserve the good things that happen to me. And feeling like a loser makes me feel like a whiner. I have no idea where it comes from. But let's try to stay positive:

People like me, right?!? (Of course not! Who the hell would like you?) (Shut up!)

And come on, I'm pretty good at my job, right?!?
(No way! You suck so bad!) (Shut up!)

And I'm definitely going to find um...well, I guess two out of three isn't bad. (At least we agree on this one...) (SHUT UP!!!!)

(In case you're wondering, that's me arguing with myself inside my head. And yes, I do this all the time.)

Every once in a while, this feeling of insecurity comes at me like a tidal wave, and I have hardly any defense against it. The good thing is, I'm still holding on, doing my best to still show myself at work and in social situations. I would have crawled back into my shell and would have completely hidden myself from the outside world. But still, doing so had drained me mentally. I've been feeling tired all the time during the last couple of weeks. Not in the normal, sleepy sort of way (though I'm feeling sleepy already since 8:30 pm), but more in an empty sort of way.

Wow, that was a lot of complaining! I guess I just needed to get that out of my system before I go crazy. (No, it's because you're such a whiner!) (Shut up!)

My M3 Score: 85%